I really must be better about updating my journal, as so much happens I get lost if I don't keep up on top of things...

I'll start with the lowlight of last week, to get it out of the way. Midian, for a few days, seemed to be overrun by what Luci referred to as "Green Meanies," but I heard them called sylphs, attached to an artifact of some sort. Fortunately I, and the people I care most about, did not have any direct run-ins, but many people did and the stories I heard were terrifying. It seems, however, that they've been beaten back, and I haven't seen or heard of any in the city for a couple of days. I'm sure the quiet will not last, but I will pray that it does.

The highlight of the past week, however, was that I got to attend a wedding on the mainland that Father Eamon officiated! I did not know the bride and groom going in, though they were both gracious and lovely, but ohh, I had the most wonderful time... not only was it on the mainland, as I said, which involved sun and warmth and birds and lush, green grass and all the things I forget I miss while in Midian, but I got to wear a dress. I know this may not sound like much, but the occasions are rare when I get to put on heels and fix my hair and fuss over my makeup and wear real jewelry. To think I took all that for granted, and not so long ago. But Father Eamon did a beautiful job. It was his first wedding ceremony since coming to the city, and I know he was a little nervous, even if he didn't let it show. As always, his words transported me, and I believed everything he said. It was easy, there in the sunshine and with the endless blue, blue sky over our heads. I could close my eyes--not completely, as I wanted to see and soak in everything--but enough to pretend that if things were just the tiniest bit different...

Of course, they're not. But for a little while, I could pretend, and it is those moments that get me through the more difficult times.

And perhaps best of all, while I did not get a chance to dance at the wedding, I did manage to wrangle one after we came home. For me, the day could not have ended any better than that. *smiles*

The rest of the week has been a mix of emotions and minor events. The staff is growing at Zoe's (as are the smattering of left-behind tip jars in the restaurant. If people are not careful, others will run off with their tips! *laughs*). I met Paulie, who might be the largest man I've ever seen. But he was friendly enough. I especially liked Vampi, who was almost shockingly friendly, compared to most of the people I meet. Just today I found out Luci had an... incident with an apparent drug dealer at the restaurant. I haven't had a chance to see for myself, but I had a good talk with Luci and I don't think we'll have to worry about her accepting joints from strangers again. Or, hopefully, people she knows. But I'm new to this pseudo-surrogate sister/mother thing, so I don't know for certain that I got through to her.

And Mass... Oh, Mass! I forget it's actually been a couple of weeks since I updated, and that two weeks ago we actually had a shooting in the middle of the service! Some woman, a Legion member I believe, just opened fire for no apparent reason, hitting two women, including one catwalker. Both were fine, and for some inexplicable reason the shooter was released from the MPD about an hour later. That was my first experience with a shooting, and I would be lying to say it didn't unnerve me. I tried to keep my calm, however, and not let it show. I think I succeeded. But that was followed by a... I'm not sure what to call her. A tragedy, certainly. The mutant woman who was once a Neko that Sister Lisbeth ran into previously showed up, latched to the ceiling. Father Eamon managed to talk her down, but I'm not sure how much good it did. She, for all intents and purposes, died, right there in the antechamber, then just as quickly came back to life and bounded out of the church, leaving a pool of blood behind, both on the carpet and all over Father Eamon.

Last week's Mass was much calmer, in terms of violence. I, however, am... struggling, for lack of a better word. I can't explain much more than that, which is part of my struggle, but my faith is being tested in a way I hadn't expected. It started as a suspicion that has grown into a near-certainty, and I have been praying every night for God to keep me focused on what I know to be true, to trust in what I believe. An irony, I realize, given the circumstances, but I have never questioned God's wisdom in putting the both of us into this situation in the first place. The doubt and worry lie only in my own heart, and I must find a way to get past it, or at least around it. I knew, logically, the challenges I would face here, and thought I understood the journey that lay before us when it came to pass that I would stay. But the reality is so much different. It's worth it, oh, so very worth it, and I would not be anywhere else than by his side. Even in this place, even with this glimmer of heartache.

But always I have believed in love, in all its forms, and so shall I continue, and trust that God will bear that belief out in truth.